My wife and I stayed at the GLN from 7-11 Sep ’08 and we must say that the resort fell far below our expectations. We paid approx. $600 per night and expected much more for the money.

Here are the highlights of our review:

Check-in: We had requested a garden view, and upon our arrival we were told that we were being upgraded to the clothing optional side. The hotel was at a 20%-25% occupancy rate (approx 75-90 people) and at that, we waited 40 minutes for our room. We were invited to have lunch while we waited, so the time went by quickly.

Room: Spacious, ample closet space, but quite a bit outdated. We had an A/C problem on day 2. The condenser unit was not working properly, creating condensation to accumulate on the floor and a puddle of water behind the sofa. Went to the front desk and within 1 hours time, it was repaired. Housekeeping came twice a day to refresh the room and they were great.

Restaurants: Because of the low occupancy rate, the Grand Terrazza was never available for lunch (contrary to the brochure) so our only options were the Lido or Timber House. The Piacere was semi-elegant. The service was outstanding, and the presentation was great. Bear in mind that jackets are required and they will discreetly give you one to wear if you forget. Munasan is the place to go, but you can either dine at the tepanyaki tables or sushi bar, not both. The portions are large and the preparation is a show in itself. Sherika prepared our food and she did a great job. The Lido offered 2-3 selections and the entrée selections changed daily, but the restaurant had a musty odor.

Overall, the food in my mind fell below the purported claim of “The Best in the Caribbean.”

Water Sports: For the first three days, we were repeatedly told that the water sports would not be available due to high winds and visibility problems. This phenomenon happened only at the GLN as our neighboring properties had activities. The day before we left my associates Q, Blonde-Bond and our wives, M, Miss Money-Penny and Holly Goodhead decided to push the issue and get upper management involved. Low and behold, the seas calmed and the visibility was no longer an issue. So on the day we left, we were able to use the glass-bottom boat.

Pool: In need of repair as many tiles are missing from the side wall. Around the pool, be careful as tiles are cracked.

Jacuzzi’s: The water was much too hot for me and my associate Q. When we brought this to someone’s attention, they told us they did not know how to adjust the temperature. The Jacuzzi is the only place you will find a lobster, you after you get out.

Staff: Front desk staff is good. The housekeeping staff is great. Barbara the second in command did her very best and was responsible for getting us on the glass bottom boat. Roberto is the GM of the hotel and you can spot him very easily. Just look for the frazzled guy with a phone pressed against his head. But, go to Barbara if you have a problem.

CAUTION:
Male bartenders seem to get a little too friendly with the female guests.

A water sports employee asked me if I was good. I said I would like a beer. He said he wasn’t allowed at the bar, but did say he could get me anything else I wanted. (Read between the lines if you wish).
One bartender informed my associate Q that he would “wipe him off the face of the earth.” At this point, Q had to give the man a lesson in foreign relations and the situation was diffused, luckily for the bartender!

Waiters, contrary to policy do and will ask for tips.

Overall: I realize that we chose to come here during low season, but that does not mean that we should expect less. I don’t know how this property got into Conde Nast’s “Best in the Caribbean”. Nor do I know what the other SuperClubs are like if this is the Flagship. All I do know is the property is 18 years old, and in need of major renovations. It is obvious that the GLN was grand at some time, but that time must have been many years ago.

I recently returned from my first stay(but not my last , I'm going back in February)at Grand Lido Negril. The resort as a whole was quite beautiful. The rooms on the au naturale side were very nice but the excellent treatment by the staff is what impressed me the most. Everyone seemed completely dedicated to making my stay as relaxing and comfortable as possible. I went scuba diving each day and the watersports staff of Seaweed, Lloyd and boat captain Donovan were wonderful dealing with both experienced divers and those just learning. 24/7 room service is great if you don't feel like dressing up (or dressing at all).

I can't wait to go back!

It took a couple of months for me to finally get around to writing this, but here it goes:

Accomodations:
nice room, comfortable bed, always a comfortable temperature inside, always spotless, mini-fridge always stocked daily (with pop, water, beer) quiet, flat panel t.v. with lots of channel selection, huge bathroom with large marble shower (it had 8 heads/body sprayers!), balcony was small and we used it mostly for hanging up wet bathing suits. We stayed in the nude section of the resort even though we didn't go nude and had no problems. I guess if you're a severe prude, it may turn you off, but really, who cares?

Lobby/Buildings:
overall, everything was okay. It's an older resort, so its not super fancy or modern, but everything was clean and well maintained. The gardens & grounds were impeccable and there were always people working on them.

Beach:
this is the second best beach I've ever been to; white sand, clear turquoise water, clean. I loved the beach. There were always plenty of chairs and lots of shady areas. Beach bar was great and the bartenders would make their way up and down the strip to take orders. There were nachos & cheese in the bar area, and jamaican patties around noon (although these typically went fast if you weren't standing there waiting for them) which was perfect if you drank a little too much the night before and slept through breakfast. ha ha ha. There were sea-dooers that would drive by and ask if you wanted a ride/to buy some marijuana, but generally if you said no, they wouldn't bother you again. There were no vendor's walking up or down (which was nice), but there was a quaint little band that was allowed to come down the beach and play. They were very good and we gave them a good tip and a couple bottles of water.

Food;
Overall, I'd say the food was above my expectations and quite excellent at most of the restaurants. The French restaurant was the best... and could possibly have made the best steak I've ever eaten in my life. Japanese is also very good. Didn't get to eat at the jerk hut as it was closed most of the week. The Timber House was great for lunch (lambchops = delicious), and there was another restaurant, the name is eluding me, (adjacent to the buffet) which was also delicious, we ate there several times. The buffet food was also very good, which surprised me as usually I've found that it can be quite horrifying and mostly inedible at other resorts.

Pool:
Pool was very small, but nice and clean. We were there during the off season and I still found that it was quite a task to find a lounger in the shade. Usually we had to race after lunch (with a group that were unaware that we were racing them, lol ) to get a good spot by the pool. It makes me wonder what the pool is like during peak vacation season...

Other incidentals:
- we had a couples massage in a hut overlooking the ocean, it was awesome.
- the ladies who gave us our free mani-pedi were pretty miserable and it was the only time we encountered unpleasant staff the whole time.
- Because of the small and intimate nature of the resort, I found that a lot of the guests got to know each other and hung out together, which is nice. I much rather prefer the atmosphere of a smaller resort to a large place for this reason. We made friends with a couple from NYC, a couple from New Hampshire and a couple from Mississauga Ont. (close to where we're from).

All in all, it was an extremely pleasant stay and I really have no complaints. Of course there will always be people who find the most random (and irrelevant) things to whine about, but then it seems that those are the people who are generally miserable in all aspects of life, and tend to go out of their way to nit-pick about everything. So, please take overly negative reviews with a grain of salt.

My wife and I have been vacationing at the Grand Lido Negril since 1994. True is the fact that the resort is older and not as up to date as the new mega resorts. She is, however, still classy and upscale. I would love to see the new resorts on Bloody Bay after 19 years of service, numerous hurricanes and the ravages of a tropical environment.
The staff at the Grand Lido Negril is what truly brings us back year after year. Some people complain about service and staff. I have never found this to be a problem. I would like to acknowledge a few staff members that have become good friends and have enhanced our stay.

Main Bar - Farrah
Room Service - Cheryl Huie
Water Sports - Robert and Dwight
Bar Supervisor - Kathleen Quarrie
General Manager - Roberto Pelliccia
Resort Manager - Barbara Burton

If you ever have problems during your stay seek assistance from one of these fine individuals. They are all very approachable and accommodating.

We will be returning November 29, 2008 to celebrate the resort anniversary Dec 6. During this week many repeat guest return home to take in all of the weekly festivities.

If you are looking for a fast paced vacation the Grand Lido Negril is not for you. If you are looking to be relaxed, pampered and safe I see no better option on the west end of this island nation.